9 Ways Really Stupid People Use Twitter

               We’re all aware by now of the many benefits to using Twitter, such as maintaining a network of friends and colleagues with whom to communicate and share ideas. Sadly, the fact that these activities include humans means that there will be some percentage of genuinely head scratch-inducing behavior. The following are 9 ways that really stupid people use Twitter:

1. Linking their tweets to other social sites. There’s a reason people are on Facebook and not on Twitter. If you want attention from someone on Facebook, drop them a message or post an update – on Facebook.

2. Incorrect or inappropriate use of hashtags. The actual purpose of hashtags, or at least the original intent behind them, was to create a search tool that would allow users to find info (tweets) associated with a specific topic. Now people are using them just to distinguish their decidedly pointless tweets with obscure references that serve no purpose whatsoever.

3. Stupid people tend to be, shall we say, originality challenged. Their solution? Well, there’s no reason not to update non-stop simply because you’ve got nothing to say. All you need to do is RT (retweet) posts from other members. Coming up with your own content is severely overrated.

4. Twitter was never intended to serve as a substitute for instant messaging or phone calls, for that matter. Posting back and forth in the form of an ongoing real-time conversation is just clogging up the works for everyone else and renders the whole concept behind tweets and updates moot.

5. Posting every single tune they find inspirational, each time they hear it. Look, sport, you may envision your alter ego to be some uber- hip and popular DJ, but we have some bad news to break to you: nobody wants someone else to provide the soundtrack to their lives, OK? Cool it.

6. Quoting. This is the sort of thing that gets you unfollowed. It’s completely unoriginal by its very nature, not to mention the fact that so many other morons do it at the same time. Don’t try to be someone’s motivational posters and their DJ. Enough already.

7. Auto-following. Auto-following is completely contrary to what social networks and following are all about. The idea is to find those individuals and topics that interest you and follow them. It’s the only worthwhile purpose for spending any time on these sites. Why undo it all by automatically following anyone who chooses to follow you?

8. Advertising. It rarely works, unless it’s your actual gig. Otherwise it simply comes off as cloying, barely disguised (if at all) spam. The idea is to develop an interest in who you are and what you’re about without resorting to outright sales pitches.

9. Auto-tweeting is another waste of time; but worse, it’s a waste of our time as well as yours, stupid tweeter. It’s absolutely unnecessary to have some bot send out a tweet every time you update your website or post a new pic. Please stop. I’ve got enough to keep track of already, thank you.